The Status Quo

I suppose it’s best to to start at the very beginning- the basic definition of “the status quo.” According to one of the standard dictionaries, it is a Latin phrase meaning “existing state.” Simple enough.

Societally, when we reference the status quo, we often mean it in a negative (read: bad) way. When we talk about people who want to maintain the “status quo”existing state,” what we are really saying is that those people are resistant to change and, subsequently, progress.

The Sober Status Quo

In the first few years of my sober journey, I heard a lot about the how things “have always been done.” I heard this a lot when people talked about 12-step programs, and how those programs were the best way to stay sober.

To clarify, when most of those people said these programs were the “best” way to stay sober, they really meant the programs were the “only” way to stay sober.

Here’s the shocking thing. This desperate hold on the way things “have always been done” extends past the sober community. It’s a belief held by the majority of society.

My mom and I were talking about 12-step programs. During our talk, she mentioned that one of my aunts made a comment about how Pete (name changed for anonymity) would never stay sober. Like me, Pete decided to try something other than a 12-step program.

I was immediately annoyed. Not just for Pete, but also myself. And I told my mom as much.

In an attempt at damage control, my mom said my aunt made a distinction between me and my cousin. My aunt believed I could deviate from the status quo and succeed. But she wholeheartedly believed my cousin would fail.

Whether or not this is true is besides the point. And it’s a topic I don’t plan on bringing up with my aunt any time soon.

Let’s say my aunt did say I would succeed. I already had three years of sobriety; I had already beaten the odds. So I was a safe bet.

The point is that new ideas and change are often met with massive resistance. And that’s clearly the case within the sober community, and society, in general.

Nothing Changes

Real talk: nothing changes if nothing changes.

That quote is absurdly simplistic. But it is one of the truest statements one can make.

It can be terrifying to leave the comfortable and embrace the unknown. Believe me, I get it. In fact, every single human on this planet can agree- change is scary.

Any time we feel resistant to change, we need to ask ourselves one question.

Can I live with the mediocre, and all the problems that come with it, for the rest of my life?

If Nothing Changes

Life is already short. Like, so short we often don’t realize it’s passing us by until it’s too late. Why waste any more time adhering to tradition and sticking with the status quo?

The moment we become passive in life, never asking questions or trying something new or working towards a better life, is the moment we stop living.

The status quo is, simply put, the current step we are on. But is sure as heck isn’t the top step of the staircase.